Bully to Friend in the End

Dear Dr. Brilliant Cliché;

I have known my mechanic for many years now and we’ve had some good talks. He’s always reminded me of someone from my past and it was quite a surprise when I realized recently who it was- the school bully who used to torture me on the playground.

It’s funny, because my mechanic is a really nice guy now, a good dad, a hard worker. We each have a very different way of looking at the world, but he respects me and finds my opinions interesting. I suspect that 35 years ago he would have probably been making fun of my clothes and giving me a bloody nose. But now, we find that the differences between us make for good conversation.

I got to wondering what would happen if bullies and their “victims” were brought together after a lifetime of experience. If they didn’t recognize each other, do you think that they could become friends? I think it would make for a better reality show that most of the crap out there.

Billy not Bully

Dear Billy,

I’ll bet. Life can be ironic that way.  It’s heartening to know people can change and grow. This would be a much better and healthier message than the superficial NON REALITY junk shown on TV. Reality TV reminds me of the orangutans at the zoo.  They are only fun to watch until they fling their crap at you for watching.

Dr. Brilliant Cliché

 

Granny says: I’d like to think that on your Bully/Victim reality show all of the adults would get along but considering the large number of adult children out there, I suspect that many of the bullies have remained as unenlightened as ever and the victims still carry the scars.

Your mechanic friend may remind you of your childhood bully, but he is not your childhood bully. That makes a huge difference. Just as ex-spouses can never really be as impartial towards each other, I think that a bully and his/her victim will never be impartial towards each other. They might work at being friends for the sake of the camera, but sooner or later, the buried feelings would surface.

Would you be chummy with your mechanic if he’d been the actual guy who tortured you back in school? I don’t know. Are you a masochist?

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About Dr. Brilliant Cliché

Dr. Brilliant Cliché and the Granny Dr. are a fictional web presence and advice blog. Together we offer a joint perspective that is deep but not academic, entertaining but not fluff, and educated yet street smart. By joining the internet community we hope to share thoughts and stimulate insightful conversation around pressing issues that affect us all. Looking forward to hearing your thoughts. (This is not a site for therapy nor does it intend to replace medical or other professional care. ) You can leave comments here or email The Dr. at dr.brilliantcliche@yahoo.com and don’t forget to like us on facebook. Our facebook page is Dr. Brilliant Cliche
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