I hear almost every day, you are so smart your kids are so lucky to have you as their dad ….
The greatest irony of this whole business of observing people and giving advice is you would think that all you have learned and everything you know would make a difference in your own life. Been there heard that no problem I know just what to do. But in reality it doesn’t.
Your kids know you, they do not know that what you know is wright or wrong, brilliant or profound. Your kids know you so well and they know what your buttons are, they know just how to challenge you. Developmentally they even have to challenge you to test what you know to know if it is true. That means they will be better at messing with you than anyone you have ever come across before, even your spouse.
This is why in and of itself nothing you know, no truth, no philosophy, no wisdom, really matters at home. It isn’t that they will challenge directly but you yourself and your consistency in your belief and knowledge when they try to shake it. And shake it they will.
But if you don’t freak out or loose it too badly, and learn to stay consistent; if you understand what is really being asked; then you are role modeling your knowledge, your belief and teaching it is in fact true.
Over many years you might get to observe them in their behavior mirroring you and yours. Hopefully it was the same ones you were trying to teach rather than the reactive ones you might have modeled?