Dear Dr. Brilliant Cliché,
All I hear about is love, love love.. Love makes the world go round, a life worth living is a life of love, Love will make it all better, yada yada. I loved my husband. He left me and his two young children to be with his secretary. Love isn’t always that great. In fact sometimes it just hurts. Is it just me or are we all just being fooled?
Love is an emotion. Life is your choices. People who live solely for passion aren’t very consistent and tend not to have long lasting relationship skills. Although you didn’t choose your husband’s betrayal, that was his choice, you get to choose how it will affect you from here on. He seems to have chosen to live by his passions; if you continue to stay forever bitter then you are also deciding to live by your passions. Sometimes love is sweet and sometimes bitter. Often it’s both at the same time. Love is important but it’s not everything. Someone still has to take out the garbage. I think the meaning of life is not love. I think it is balance. Find someone who is better balanced and learn to balance with them.
Good luck in your quest.
Dr. Brilliant Cliché
Granny says: Love is a word that has many different levels of meaning. I love my grandson so much I would die for him without blinking. Some couples love each other so much they would do anything to work through their problems.
The type of love you had for your husband was a different sort. It wasn’t the stuff people write poetry over or die for. You had a misplaced fantasy of who your husband was- and in reality, he was a sleaze ball who had no regard for you at all. If you loved a sleaze ball who had no regard for you at all, then you really do have a problem. But I think you loved your fantasy of him not the man himself. btw- being bitter is going to get you absolutely nowhere. If you can accept the fact that you had your own part in all of this, you can learn, move on, and build a better life.
Someone ought to come up with better words for love-
like Eskimos have hundreds of different words for snow