Dear Dr. Brilliant Cliché,
My wife and my 15 year old daughter are both very well endowed. I appreciate my wife’s natural assets but worry about how those same assets will affect my daughter. I try to tell her it is inappropriate to strut her stuff without discrimination; I think she needs to learn to protect herself. But both my daughter and my wife get down on me for my efforts. How do I get this message across?
My wife and daughter think that it is their right, as beautiful woman, to display their assets, and if other people have a problem with it, too bad.
Cover them up
Dear Cover Up,
It is indeed their right; yet that shouldn’t replace common sense. Tell your daughter to imagine that her breasts are large, beautiful diamonds. It is wonderful to show them off, but the consequences will be the same as if they were diamonds. Large breasts and diamonds will both elicit wonder and awe from some, jealousy and envy from others… and sheer lust from yet others. There will be those who will try to use her to get to them. And there will be those who feel it is their right to molest her and just take them.
In any situation where it is inappropriate or dangerous to display two large diamonds, it is also inappropriate or dangerous to put one’s breasts on display.
I hope this helps,
And sign her up for karate….
Dr. Brilliant Cliché
Granny says: I’m as appreciative of a nice set of headlights as the next person… but one has to consider a factor: generally, books are judged by their cover, and the opinions that others form of us are based on what they see.
Granny wants to point out that there are degrees of breast display, just as there are degrees of skin burns. First degree display would be a nicely fitted, non-transparent top that clearly shows the shape and size of the breasts, without showing any cleavage. Second degree display would be a top that is cut a bit lower, with cleavage tasteful enough that Tina Fey could wear it on 30 Rock- sexy, but not slutty. Third degree display would be breasts that are so exposed, that they will be getting dirty looks from the street walkers who think there’s a new bitch trying to cut into their business.
Your daughter needs to know that there is only one thought that will occupy the mind of any boy her own age, when faced with a bodacious set of ta ta’s: complete, unabated lust. If your daughter’s breasts are so beautiful that she really feels she is depriving the world by keeping them tastefully covered, then I suggest that she find work as an artist’s model. That way, her breasts will be preserved through eternity as a thing of beauty, and they will be given the sincere and respectful admiration they deserve, by a far greater audience than she can possibly reach at the mall.